As usual, the photos that we took can be found on Flickr. Some of the photos used in this blog post were taken by friends of ours or the wedding photographers and don't appear on Flickr. Those will be noted with credit when used.
Day 3 Event 2: Turban Tying
At this point we're making solid progress through the preliminaries and to the actual wedding itself. However, we're not quite there yet. The height of fashion for men in the groom's party (and the groom himself) is to wear a turban for entrance to the wedding and the wedding itself. The family, knowing a whole bunch of men were going to need turbans and that this is perhaps not an everyday item, hired a turban tying guy to bring over some turbans and apply them to us, which was a novel experience.
I think the key thing to know about wearing a turban, at least using these materials and applied by this particular guy, is that it is very uncomfortable, mostly by being extremely tight. I am reasonably confident the goal is to make sure the turban doesn't come undone during the wedding, but from the minute the job was done there was definitely a part of my brain ready to take it off. However, we all needed to be wearing them so we sucked it up and agreed basically to wait for the bus back to remove them. Perhaps this could be thought of as an experience for building empathy for other seemingly painful fashions in history such as the corset and high heeled shoes. The turban guy was also really insistent about trying to get tips even though he'd been paid not to ask for them by the family - once a family member cottoned on to that they told off the turban dude for trying to get paid twice.
Apparently we looked good to onlookers. I thought the turban material could not have been calculated to clash harder with what I was wearing. Fortunately, a whole bunch of clashing bright colors is not nearly as much a problem in India - I think it communicates that you're getting into the spirit of things.
Day 3 Event 3: Entrance to the Wedding
Not content to merely have an impressive entrance for the bride, both sides of the aisle have major entrances in India - or at least, in the parts the bride and/or groom are from. In this case, the bride's family was waiting at the venue, the groom's family and groom made a big show of getting there and greeting them, they all made nice and hung out for a bit, then the bride had her own separate entrance. At any rate, the entrance is a big deal and it is understood that you should make as much noise as possible to show you're serious about the whole thing.
Nik's brother briefing us on the bus - we know him from college and he's actually Lee's little in the fraternity Lee was in with Nik
The groom's side bused from the hotel to the venue together along with at least some of our hired noise - a really big wedding will use an elephant (or at least a horse) for the groom to enter on along with a whole big band, but Nik had put his foot down for less pomp and so he walked in and we only had a couple of drummers and a piper guy. You're still supposed to dance and yell like crazy, so we did that part, with Nik's brother leading the way and dancing like crazy.
Getting warmed up for the procession - these surly looking drummers would stand next to you and drum really loud until you tipped them. Note the two gentlemen in the center with flowers on them - the one on the left is the groom and the one on the right is a younger cousin of the bride. The cousin's job is to make sure the groom doesn't try to skip out on the wedding. There are some ceremonies where the groom has to pretend he's not serious and he's going to bail, and the cousin has to speak up about the bride's virtues and offer sort of bribes for the groom to stay and go through with it. At one point the groom has to threaten to go join the priesthood instead of getting married and the cousin has to convince him otherwise.
Making a ruckus going from the bus to the venue
Arriving at the actual venue - flowers were AMAZING at all events and places - those are all fresh marigolds in the orange stripes there, and that canopy is probably 25 feet deep.
The bride got her own noisy arrival - her party is smaller because a lot of them have to be at the venue already to meet the groom's troop. Also that guy with the little silver horn can create some really piercing sounds.
Day 3 Event 4: They Actually Get Married at some point while we're all eating appetizers
Once both parties are actually at the venue, the wedding goes on for hours. At some point in there they get officially married, but that doesn't end the ceremony - it's just a point in the middle and there is a lot more to go. So the good part is, nobody expects the guests to actually attempt to pay attention to the whole thing - you basically go get some appetizers, talk to people, and every now and then go and check in on the wedding ceremony itself. All the bride's-side-hosted events (including this one) were vegetarian-only but there were still dozens of interesting things to eat while the wedding went on.
For the first set of ceremonies, bride and groom were up on a stage to one side. Preliminaries went on for a while and then they put garlands on each other.
There were also a lot of pictures taken on this stage with friends and family
After the shorter part on the stage they moved to a centrally located set of seats with a priest so folks involved weren't standing for hours.
The crowd would circulate as folks came to check in on what was happening as the prayers and ceremonies continued into the evening.
Flowers hanging down from the wedding pavilion
Meanwhile...
The venue was outdoors, extensive, and amazingly decorated with flowers
I had one mint mocktail (this is a no-booze event) then a really spicy appetizer. I went for another mint mocktail and accidentally got one that was filled with hot peppers in addition to the mint. This did not improve the situation.
Banquet had about three times as many options as you could possibly try
At one point in there, after the ceremonies were over but before the event itself ended, the bride and groom sort of become available to meet with people, but after hours and days of lead-up and prep they're pretty exhausted. All the foreigners (and some international family members) got together in a big group to basically stand shoulder to shoulder and keep other people away to buy the couple a few minutes' peace. I think someone went out and brought back food and some bottled water and so on and we just made space for them to cram some food in and get a breather. So in that respect you can say we contributed to the goings-on. After a few minutes determined groups of well-wishers started breaching our lines and the bride and groom had to wade back into the fray.
Finally, after a lot of eating and talking and watching ongoing praying and chanting and various other things (and probably most of the guests left at some point in here, but obviously we're in the for whole thing) the last big event of the evening is sending the new couple off. The piper got going with some fairly piercing tunes everyone remaining got together for a few final (for this day) ceremonies to send them off.
And you might think this wedding thing is just about over, but you'd be so, so wrong. The reception is also days long and actually takes place far enough away that we had to get on a plane to get there. We'll pick up on the way to Hyderabad for the second half of the trip.
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